Thanos Loves Dave!

Comic books are a wild weird wonderful place where anything can happen. The website Superdickery.com does a great job showcasing some offbeat moments or items that out of context can seem downright out of place. Take Superman screwing with real life musician Pat Boone for instance.


Through the years any number of strange team ups and story lines have been explored, including Thanos's special relationship with Death.

In the Marvel Universe Death is an actual character, a powerful entity pictured in a manner completely opposite the cut pixie goth girl depicted by the distinguished competition.


No, Death in the Marvel U is the classic version - the hooded skeleton wearing dark robes, always silently gesturing. About the only thing the DC an Marvel universes agree on is that Death is a lady... except when she isn't. But more on that later.


Given the lack of vocal chords I can see how Death's relationship with Thanos works. As your typical megalomaniacal conqueror Thanos is obviously prone to talking - telling the heroes all about his plans, boasting and aggrandizing himself constantly. There's always one quiet one in a twosome.

Talk, talk, talk... evil likes to hear itself plot.

Death hasn't always had an exclusive relationship with Thanos however. Among former beaus she counts the Beyonder as a former love interest, as when she shows up for a date with the Mutant Inhuman in Secret Wars II (issue #2).



Now, the Beyonder was "beyond" a little crazy, to the point of Craigslist killer crazy and so it's no surprise that by the end of the date he's completely wiped Death from existence, just to prove to his friend Dave that he can.

And that's when the metaphorical can of worms gets opened, because suddenly nothing can die. The worms in the can have nothing to eat. This is a problem.



The lack of death starts freaking out the *other* crazy omnipotent folk of the Marvel U, like the Molecule Man who confronts the Beyonder.



The issue ends with Dave nobly (or stupidly) offering to sacrifice himself...

And the Beyonder complies restoring balance to the world by transforming Dave into Death.



And that explains the title of this post: Thanos loves Dave.

Transgendered romances are nothing new to comics. Currently there's the asexual Xavin from Runaways...



Good thing he's a shape-shifting Skrull who could easily adopt a female form to woo the once closeted Karolina Dean.



The 90's explored the idea with Shvaughn Erin, girlfriend of Element Lad was revealed to be a man but only after supplies of a gender bending drug (the aptly named Profem) were cut off to Earth during a war with the Dominators.



And the 80's saw the New Defenders member Cloud pull an "In-Betweener" and assume a male form to woo Moondragon.



Oh the delicious irony of that storyline now that Moondragon is out of the closet.



However, in all of the cases above, these "couples" are far from mainstream. Thanos may not exactly be a marquee name but as the villain masterminding the Infinity Gauntlet story arc he certainly has a lot of recognitions. There's a part of me that is really entertained by the notion that Thanos, the all powerful "Mad Titan" loves Dave.

I mean, this is the same Thanos who humbled the lord of Hell.




The Thanos who ascended to god-hood after collecting the Infinity Gems from the elders of the universe.



Thanos who beat the great powers of the universe (including Galactus) and eradicated half of existence all in an attempt to impress Dave.



Who knew the Mad Titan could know such love?



Maybe that's just how they roll on Titan, or maybe his brother Eros, AKA Starfox is to blame. Starfox has been known to turn people faster than you could say "Pink Kryptonite".



But then that's another wild weird and wonderful story for another day.